Essential music - Dulcinea

Album: Dulcinea
Artist: Toad the Wet Sprocket
Released: 1994

It seems only right to start out my list of essential albums with my favorite album, by my favorite band of all time. Toad was one of those bands that seemed to exist on the margins of the mainstream. They had a few top 40 hits, but were obscure enough that people would cock their head to the side a little bit if you said the band name to them. They were "the band that played that song... you know the one..."

Dulcinea was released in 1994, and was somewhat an anomaly in the sonic landscape of that year. Let me take you back to some of the releases in 1994:

Nine Inch Nails - The Downward Spiral
Soundgarden - Superunknown
Stone Temple Pilots - Purple
Alice in Chains - Jar of Flies
Weezer - Weezer (the blue album)
Live - Throwing Copper
Green Day - Dookie
Bush - Sixteen Stone
Hole - Live Through This

1994 was a fairly loud and angry year in music. Even R.E.M. changed up their sound in 1994, releasing the guitar heavy and uncharacteristic "Monster." And in the midst of that, came Dulcinea.

The album starts with a tickle of cymbals sweeping into the opening song, "Fly From Heaven," a song from the viewpoint of someone (brother, disciple?) who loved Jesus as a person, rather than a messiah, lamenting what became of their loved one. Yes, the album did have some slightly crunchy guitars, which rear their heads in the second song "Woodburning" but the majority of the album is far more melodic and jangly - sounding more akin to pre-1994 R.E.M. than post-Nirvana grunge.

The album produced a few radio gems in "Something's Always Wrong" and "Fall Down" but the album tracks go far beyond these two songs. There is gentle self-flagellation on "Stupid" and the country-tinged ode to splitting up reflected in the division of a record collection in "Nanci." "You take Nanci, for me Loretta's fine. No, I've changed my mind. I'll take Nanci, for you Loretta's fine."

The album flows through each song, changing tempo and direction like a river. At the heart of the songs is a touch of sadness, like lead singer Glen Phillips was looking at the world and finding the grey areas after years of seeing black and white.

For me, there are a few gut wrenchingly gorgeous moments on this album, which most people didn't hear, as they really didn't receive airplay. The first, "Crowing" was released as a single but was lost somewhere along the way. The song touches on how some people always look for a partner who needs fixing, because it gives them a purpose.

"Been waiting to find
You could've been happier given the time
If he'd make up his mind
You'd give yourself to anybody
Who would cross that line
And it was never a question
He was crowing for repair
You'd give him love and affection
But you couldn't keep him there..."

The title of the album came from the Cervantes book "Don Quixote" and the theme of fighting illusions and inner demons is woven throughout the album. The visual of Quixote attacking the giants is given a nod in "Windmills," the song which I consider to be the crown jewel of this beautiful album. "I spend too much time raiding windmills. We go side by side, laugh until it's right." I believe I can never tire of this song. I have heard this song performed live with the band, with Glen playing solo, backed up by Sean and Sara Watkins, with Mutual Admiration Society, and it still gives me chills every time and in every incarnation. I have actually reached a point that I can tell this song is going to be played just by how the guitar is being tuned. "Take the darkest hour break it open. Water to repair what we have broken." This song is beautiful and melodic. Every note, every vocal - lead and background, is brilliant. I have nothing bad to say about this song.

The album closes with the odd and jarring "Reincarnation Song." The first time I heard this song, I was mortified, but it has since clarified itself to me, as good songs often do. A few years back I was talking to Toad's then-manager, Chris Blake, and asked him what the first thing he thought when he heard this song. His reply? "Oh, shit." Apparently Glen had been reading the Tibetan Book of the Dead, and wrote a song from the viewpoint of a soul leaving it's dying body, realizing that it hasn't reached a full level of enlightenment yet, and being pulled into another corporeal vessel. The band re-recorded the song for the album, but thought the second take sounded like a cover version of the first take and scrapped it for the original. Good call.

So, if you don't have this album, get it. Don't download a few songs. Buy it. If you already own it, pull it out and listen to it again. Listen to it beginning to end. Preferably with headphones. The big foamy ones that press over your ears and block out the world. You might not love it on first listen, but with the really good ones it isn't about instant gratification it's about the long haul. "Maybe any way the wind blows, it's all worth waiting for."





Edit: This was originally posted on 10/20/2006, but I never finished my list. I'm bumping it back up to the top to force myself to continue with my list... wish me luck.

Music is essential

My friend, George, started a list (because the world is crazy for "best of" lists) of his 50 favorite albums. This got me thinking about a list of my own. I gathered cds into stacks. Listed my vinyl and tapes. Got distracted. Played a computer game. And realized that I don't have the attention span for a list. Besides, it's just too hard to play the favorites game. While one album might be brilliant for a road trip, another might be a soundtrack for utter depression.

The album itself is a fading art form. In a generation of iPod shuffling and per-song downloads, it isn't often that people listen to an album from start to finish anymore. And that's a shame. The best albums are intended to be heard as a whole. They have a common thread between the songs, be it a sound or a theme. The songs have a logical progression, a flow between fast songs and ballads. On the best albums, every aspect of the album comes together cohesively. The songs themselves are well written, the musicianship unparalleled, the singers voice an instrument blending with the music, and the production… here's my thing about production. The best producers are the ones that do their job so well, that you don't even think about the mix or the instruments being played. They let the songs exist with odd little noises in the background, they don't add in unnecessary flourishes, they have a light touch and let the music just be.

Back to my friend, George. I'm afraid I don't have his eloquence for describing music, or even share the depth of his musical collection. I encourage you to check out his blog to see his ongoing list of his top 50, and to read the prose of someone who can actually write. The guy has incredible music taste. I will quote him on this "I don't own every album. I only own what I own." I don't buy every cd that comes out. I don't rank amongst the upper echelons of music elitism that own every album by every "influential" and "essential" artist that exists. I have a hard enough time keeping up with the new music that is blowing my face off, without trying to play catch up with the back catalogue of every legend on the planet. Besides, nobody needs someone telling them that they need to be listening to Bob Dylan, or Neil Young. That's really kind of a given, isn't it?

So, instead of a top whatever list, I'm just going to randomly talk about some albums that I really think everyone should own. They are beautiful – some achingly so. Some are old, some new. I am a creature of habit, obsession, and repetition so you will undoubtedly see multiple albums by certain artists listed. Stay tuned if you're interested. Fuck off if you're not. (Just kidding. Sort of.)

Up first: Dulcinea

Edit: This post was originally written on 10/19/06, but I never finished my list. I'm bumping this to force myself to continue with my list. We'll see how that works out...

supporting the troops

I get all steamed up when I see one of those yellow ribbon "Support the Troops!" magnets on a car next to a "W" sticker. Really? Support the troops? By supporting the administration that is keeping them in a war where they are being inadequately fed, don't have access to clean water, are poorly paid, and oh yeah, being killed?

I support the troops. I want them to come home.

I know the military life more than most people. I was born on a military base. I have lived in military housing and seen military doctors. And we were poor. Really, seriously poor, living on military pay. GI Bill? I know all about that too. I watched my husband have to come up with his entire tuition and pay for it up front before being reimbursed for it. I have friends who came back from the first Gulf War sick and unable to find jobs.

My husband told me the other day that his boss's son is leaving for Iraq. I got that pit in my stomach and asked what branch of the military he is in. Turns out he's not in the military. He's a contractor. He's getting paid $60,000 to go there for 3 months. Some troops won't be paid that much in 3 years.



People should be ashamed.

bitter

i don't get why it's such a big deal that barack obama made a comment saying that voters are bitter.

i'm bitter. i admit it.

i'm bitter that more of our budget is being spent on the iraqi police force than on the u.s. education system.

i'm bitter that there are classrooms in portable buildings at my kids' school.

i'm bitter that oil companies are rolling in dough while gas prices are at an all time high.

i'm bitter that my husband works for a huge multi-national corporation, but we are only being offered catastrophic health insurance for our family this year.

i'm bitter that researchers have been able to reprogram embryonic stem cells to fight cancer, but it's too hard to fund research because most people don't bother to understand what stem cells even are, they just follow what the guy behind the pulpit says.

i'm bitter that more and more families are losing loved ones to war every single day.

i'm bitter that people would dare to say that i don't support the troops because i want them to come home alive, and as soon as possible.

i'm bitter that there are children who have never lived a day without hearing a war outside their windows.

i'm bitter that lobbyists have more say in what happens in my community than i do.

you know what i'm not bitter about? someone finally acknowledging that i'm bitter.

the year in music - 2008...thus far

and so begins my yearly ritual. more to keep track for myself than anything else. this year, i’m including cd purchases AND concerts. because i’m forgetful. and because these things need to be recorded for posterity.

well, that and i want your input on what should be my next purchases. (the list has been updated, upon request, and you can now just mouse over the pictures to see the artist and title. html coding is my friend.)

january:


february:
2/9/2008 glen phillips - avogadro’s number, ft. collins co.

march:
lemonheads - ned’s downtown, albuquerque nm.

april:
>

i chased evan dando down a dark city street

it’s true. i’m fairly ashamed. but more about that in a minute.

saw the lemonheads last night at this little place in downtown abq. i’ve been listening to the lemonheads for close to 17 years now, and maintain that "it’s a shame about ray" is one of the best albums of the ’90s. as much as i bitch and moan about the lack of concerts in abq, i can’t complain about this one. granted, it was a tuesday night, and the show didn’t start until 10:30. . . but i’m still giddy.









the concert was fun. they played almost all the songs from ray and a bunch from "come on feel..." so i spent a good part of the night bouncing around like a little kid.

my fan girl moment comes after the show. i had brought my cd cover from "lick" in hopes of an autograph, but it was getting late so we left. as i am pulling out of my parking spot, i see evan dando walking down the street with his guitar cases. i pull over, illegally park, grab my camera, sharpie, and cd case and start running down the road after him. i finally catch up to him an entire block later and wheeze something about listening to him for years. or something. i was on the verge of oxygen deprivation so i don’t remember much besides him asking me my name and being really cool about taking the picture since his arms are much longer than mine.

yeah, i’m a dork. and i’m okay with that.

calculating the worth of happiness

We all have that "thing" in our lives that soothes our soul, invigorates us, awakens our senses, ties together the experiences in our lives, and just generally brings us joy. It's different for everyone. For some that thing is art, film, hiking, cooking, playing sports, gardening. Mine is music.

My favorite singers tend to be indie singer-songwriters that only a select few people have even heard of. They work their tails off touring across the country, playing in tiny venues to their core group of fans, and a few curious newcomers. They rely on merch sales for their income and drive themselves around in rented cars from gig to gig.

My favorite singer posted a link to this article, on the brilliant blog BoingBoing, that speculates whether an artist could survive with just 1,000 true fans. The author states:

"The gist of 1,000 True Fans can be stated simply:

A creator, such as an artist, musician, photographer, craftsperson, performer, animator, designer, videomaker, or author - in other words, anyone producing works of art - needs to acquire only 1,000 True Fans to make a living.

Assume conservatively that your True Fans will each spend one day's wages per year in support of what you do. That "one-day-wage" is an average, because of course your truest fans will spend a lot more than that. Let's peg that per diem each True Fan spends at $100 per year. If you have 1,000 fans that sums up to $100,000 per year, which minus some modest expenses, is a living for most folks."

I try to do my part. I buy every album. I have drawers full of T-shirts that I honestly never wear. I take ridiculously long road trips and spend my leisure budget just to attend shows. I even buy CD's for other people, just to get the music to someone new, and to try to put one more penny in the artist's pocket. I always wondered if there was maybe something more I could do.

The aforementioned favorite singer set up a donation site, so fans could become "patrons of the arts". I've often said that I wouldn't know what to do with myself if that person stopped making music, so I clicked on the donate button and stared at the screen for several minutes trying to think of a number that accurately reflected how much the music meant to me, but for which I wouldn't have to deplete the college funds of my own children. I would type in numbers, click partway through the process, and then close the browser window. Nothing seemed appropriate. Plus, there wasn't an option for an anonymous donation, so I was also left with this dilemma: At what point do you stop being a devoted fan and start being creepy obsessive? (Dear friends, if you ever consider my behavior creepy obsessive, please promptly give me a swift kick hard in the ass to knock me back to reality. Thanks.)

This all led me to wonder - what is your "thing" worth to you? When all is said and done, how much dough do you spend to keep your thing going, and how much would you give if asked?